It’s been quite a roller coaster day for us here. No, it has nothing to do with the inauguration (although I’m waiting for so-called pro-life Obama supporters to explain his moves on that front), but something much closer to home.
Melanie had gone in to see an endocrinologist recently because of something her ob-gyn had seen in her recent tests. (For those of you just catching up, she’s about 14 weeks pregnant.) She got the call back today that she has “nodules” on her thyroid gland and they’re going to have to do a biopsy by sticking a big needle through her neck. The doctor assured her that in 95% of cases, the nodules are completely benign.
What can I not stop thinking about?
Five percent.
Normally, I’d go with the doctor on this one, chalk up the five percent to him being very conservative, and subtract a few points. But then there’s the other thing I can’t stop thinking about.
Two years ago next month. That’s when Melanie had a miscarriage and then was given a preliminary diagnosis of uterine cancer. It was a difficult time for all of us, dealing with fear and uncertainty and loss. It was certainly a Lent to remember.
So now, I’m wondering if we’re about to enter another such Way of the Cross. Last year was a tough year with lots of stress: We had a baby, my job moved, we had to find and buy a house, we had to move ourselves. Is this going to be another year of the same?
I will trust in the Lord, but there’s a little knot deep in my chest that won’t unwind itself. So I wait and I pray. And I do the best I can.
After all the doctor is 95 percent certain it’s nothing. 95 percent. 95 percent.