If only Congressmen could marry. Oh right, this has nothing to do with homosexuality. The story of Republican Rep. Mark Foley and his creepy stalking of male congressional pages is blowing up all over the news. The story so far: Foley, who sat on House committees relating to missing and exploited children, sent emails and instant messages to several male teens who worked as congressional pages, first setting them up as friends and then making all kinds of salacious and disgusting overtures.
More important—for the media and Democrats—Republican congressional leaders were supposedly told about this a year ago but did nothing, leading to the inevitable comparisons to the Scandal in the Church. The Washington Times has even called for House Speaker Dennis Hastert to resign.
Lost in all the shuffle is Foley himself. He has entered alcohol rehab, which is de rigeur these days for crisis management. If you’re famous and exhibit bizarre behavior, enter rehab and blame it on the alcohol. And learning a lesson from former New Jersey Gov. Jim McGreevey, come out of the closet and by acknowledging that you are homosexual many in the elites will be happy to give you a pass and congratulate you on your courage. Finally, have your lawyer also claim that you—a Catholic—was abused by a priest when you were a kid, but give no details. It will be accepted without question.
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