You know you’re Italian if…

You know you’re Italian if…

My brother sent me these and I was literally holding my stomach with tears coming down my face I was laughing so hard. And I laugh because so many of them are true. If you’re Italian, you’ll get it. If you’re not Italian, well, I’m sorry. I couldn’t fit them all on one page, so click on the More… link to see the rest.

You know you’re Italian if:

1. You are 5’ 4”, can bench press 325 pounds, shave twice a day, and still cry when your mother yells at you.

2.You carry your lunch in a produce bag because you can’t fit two cappicola sandwiches, 4 oranges, 2 bananas and pizzelles into a regular paper lunch bag.

3. Your mechanic, plumber, electrician, accountant, travel agent and lawyer are all your cousins.

4. For breakfast, you dunk a pack of Stella D’Oro “S” cookies in milk.

5. You live in a 900 square foot bungalow, but still have two kitchens (one in the basement).

6. You have at least 5 cousins living in the same town or street. All five of those cousins are named after your grandfather or grandmother.

7. A high school diploma and one year of community college has earned you the title of “professor” among your aunts.

8. You are on a first name basis with at least 8 banquet hall owners.

9. You only get one good shave from a disposable razor.

10. If someone in your family grows beyond 5’ 9”, it is presumed his mother had an affair.

11.There are more than 28 people in your bridal party.

12. You netted more than $10,000 on your first communion.

Written by
Domenico Bettinelli

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