How to be a grown up

How to be a grown up

It’s a sad reflection on the world we live in today that someone would seriously ask how to be a grown up.

For a whole bunch of reasons, I feel like I’m lacking some basic integrative skills in how to lead life really effectively as an adult. I’m talking about personal management here, not relationships or holding down a job or knowing what to do with my life (I’m feeling pretty okay about those!) This goes beyond any one “domain” such as financial, household management, health, etc. I really can be competent with these things individually when I put my mind to it…but given the complexities of modern life, the amount of time my work demands, and some general tendencies towards ADD, I have a really hard time making it all happen.

Where does one learn how to be a grown up? From your parents. When parents used to actually rear their children rather than warehouse them until they’re old enough to go out on their own, they were given age-appropriate tasks that helped them develop these adult skills. But now, many people are so busy with work and their social lives that the little time they have with their kids is spent playing, not rearing. And by the time they’re teens, most parents are too busy or too scared to actually ask their kids to do anything they might balk at or that will require a time commitment.

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Written by
Domenico Bettinelli