Humor
New blog: Stuff Catholics Like
With an obvious nod to the hilarious and popular blog Stuff White People Like, Jeff Miller, Ian Rutherford, and several others have started the equally hilarious Stuff Catholics Like.
Stuff White People Like is a satirical take on explaining the crazy things that people of European descent do and value. For example, recent entries have looked at the weird circumstances in which white people wear scarves—often not for warmth but for fashion; their propensity for New Balance shoes; rugby; free healthcare; and music piracy. It’s not that these are peculiarly “white” topics, but the entries explain how white folk—i.e. upper middle class Euro-Americans—put them to unusual use or approach them in a funny manner. What makes it funny is how it turns the normal attitude upside, turning the behavior of people in the minority into the norm by which the behavior of the majority is judged.
Anyway, Stuff Catholics Like also takes a satirical and light-hearted look at all things Catholic. Some entries extol the things that Catholics love from a timeless perspective, while others examine those peculiar modern inventions that drive some of us crazy. So for example, there are entries on holy water, babies, and rosaries, as well as non-Catholics wearing Catholic stuff (think the recent sighting of Clinton wearing a “Brazilian Mary bracelet”), clapping in church, and felt banners.
While it is fun—and it is important that those of you without a sense of humor, and you know who you are, should not go to the blog—it is also an opportunity to learn a thing or two. So go there, and enjoy it, and when your non-Catholic relatives, friends, and co-workers ask you “Why do Catholics…?” you’ll have a place to send them to have a laugh and understand.
2001 called and wants its web site back
Went to this site today. It’s associated with my health insurance company, a major regional company with millions in revenues every year. They probably have dozens of people working on their web site.
And yet this is the warning message I get when going to their site using the latest version of Firefox, a browser used by millions of people every day.
Also note the browsers they do claim to support. You can’t even download Netscape Navigator anymore.
The big Catholic family bunch
Marcel LeJeune sends a request to help a Catholic homeschooling family with nine kids win a scholarship contest by voting for their YouTube video:
Some friends who have a wonderful Catholic family of 9 kids, all home-schooled, are in the final 10 of a $25,000 college scholarship contest (and the parents are Aggie Catholics if you needed more incentive). They created a great video, but now need your votes to help them win. Go here to vote for them (yes, you have to fill out a short registration).
Anti-War nuts can’t afford dictionaries
Yes, we’ve all been there: embarrassing spelling errors in our work for all the world to see. Heck, I should be the last person to criticize.
Yet, if you’re Cindy Sheehan, the face of the anti-war movement in the US, in San Francisco, anti-war moonbat central, you’d think you would take extra care before standing in front of this sign:
Who’s your mommy?
Last night, as we were preparing Isabella for bed, Melanie was trying to get Bella to give her a kiss goodnight. Ever since Sophia was born, Bella’s bedtime ritual has been turned around. Instead of mommy doing the bedtime reading and rocking and tucking in after prayers, it’s daddy now. So mommy takes her leave from Bella at the end of prayers.
For some reason last night Bella was being recalcitrant with Melanie, ducking her head for a hug, instead of giving Melanie a kiss. Melanie kept coaxing her with “Give mommy a kiss, Isabella. Give her a kiss.”
In order to model the behavior she wanted, she said, “Look, daddy gives mommy a kiss.”
Then she turned to me, leaned in and said to me, “Give mommy a kiss.”
…
Um, yeah, that was a bit too weird for me.
George Washington: “Mission Accomplished”
Boston Mayor Tom Menino has a column in the local newspaper Boston Post-Gazette. Last week he recalled that March 17 is not just St. Patrick’s Day, but also the Suffolk County holiday of Evacuation Day—Boston City workers get the day off, essentially— which recounts, well, let’s let the mayor tell you.
“On March 17, 1776 the British Army finally left ‘the colonies,’ by way of Boston Harbor after being beaten in the American Revolutionary War.”
I’m not sure what Washington was doing at Yorktown but apparently the British had been gone for years. I wonder if Washington had held up a big billboard after the Battle of Bunker Hill: “Mission Accomplished.” I guess the years between 1776 and 1783 only count as a “quagmire” for the American troops.
Way to set an example for all those kids in school, Mr. Mayor. Maybe they should administer MCAS to politicians before they can take office.
Or we could call her Domino
I think we have a real shot at this.
ANN ARBOR, Mich., Feb. 25 /PRNewswire/ — While storks deliver bundles of joy to families, Domino’s Pizza delivers the birthday party. In honor of Domino’s BRKLYN (Brooklyn-style pizza), Domino’s Pizza, the recognized world leader in pizza delivery, will throw a pizza party for every family that names their child born on Feb. 29, 2008, Brooklyn. Additionally, the family of the first child named Brooklyn born in the continental U.S. on Leap Day will receive $1,000 in pizza gift certificates. All forms of the spelling Brooklyn will be accepted.
So what do you think? Brooke Lynn Bettinelli. Do you think Melanie will go for it? Feb. 29 is her due date. And, hey, free pizza! What’s not to like?
[Link via Daddy Types]
Oh, Yes, we can!
With everything that I’ve been writing about him lately, this seemed to come naturally.
Party on the Pope’s Lanai
VATICAN BASILICA PATIO DEDICATED TO GREGORY ILLUMINATOR
VATICAN CITY, 22 FEB 2008 (VIS) - At noon, during a brief ceremony attended by His Beatitude Nerses Bedros XIX, Patriarch of Cilicia of the Armenian Catholics, and a group of prelates of the Armenian Catholic Church, the Pope dedicated the north patio of the Vatican Basilica to St. Gregory the Illuminator.
Afterward they had a barbecue, cracked some brews, and kicked back to some Jimmy Buffett. Oh wait, it’s not that kind of patio?
Just give me a beer and call me Top Gun
Apparently, I would make a good fighter pilot.
Tall skinny guys that run and have low blood pressure? They’ll pass right out doing G’s.
Short, fat guys that eat a lot of red meat drink a lot of beer, and have high blood pressure? Man, you don’t even have to strain at all. You’re just, boy, you’re like it’s nothing. Nothing at all.
(Click through to the Bettnetlog and watch the video. Mind a very brief curse at the very end of the clip by a chagrined fighter pilot shown what-for by his buddy.)
World’s finest purveyor of Llama Chutes
I received the following email today, obviously a spam since the “To” address is to someone else and I’ve been BCC’d.
Hello Sir/Madam,
My name is Alan Robert and I mailed to make an enquiry of some of your Llama Chutes.E-mail me with the prices of the Llama Chutes that you have.
Quick Question:What method of payment do you accept?
Hope o hear from you soon
Thank You
Best Regards,Alan Robert (Owner)
Btbr Solutions Inc.
775-243-6610 local
775-307-8829 fax
Alan.Robert77@yahoo.com
This is so weird and random, I couldn’t help sending the following reply:
Dear Mr. Robert,
I am happy to hear from you. We carry a full line of Llama Chutes and I’m sure you’ll find just the Llama Chute you desire!
At the entry level is the Llama Chute 1000 with a capacity up to 500 llamas per hour sliding down from a maximum height of 40 feet. Our top-of-the-line model is the Llama Chute Extreme BS with a capacity of 1,000 llamas per hour and a maximum height of 100 feet. Let me tell you, those llamas get quite a ride! Whew!
The chutes are $10,000 each for the Llama Chute 1000 and $25,000 for the Extreme BS (this is our specialty) and you may send me a cashier’s check or money order drawn on US funds. No other forms of payment are possible. Thank you for your interest in Llama Chutes!
Signed your llama-loving (but in a platonic way) friend,
Domenic
I’ll let you know whether he replies. Anyway, I think this calls for a few verses of The Llama Song. I hope you enjoy that running through your head for the next few hours.
SciFi “sound” geek quiz
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I received 85 credits on The Sci Fi Sounds Quiz How much of a Sci-Fi geek are you? |
| Take the Sci-Fi Movie Quiz canon s5 is | |
Now this is a book review
This is the greatest review on Amazon ever. EVAH!1!
Amazon.com: R. Bundy’s review of The Odyssey (Penguin Classics)
5 of 80 people found the following review helpful:
By R. Bundy - See all my reviews
★☆☆☆☆ THIS BOOK WOULD BE BETTER IF IT WERE BURNED!
THIS PATHIC BOOK MAKES NO SENSE ONCESOEVER!!! HOMER IS A HORRIBLE WRITER!! DO NOT WASTE YOUR TIME ON THIS!!! NOT EVEN WORTH ONE STAR!!!!
Also where were Marge and Bart and Lisa? Not to mention there wasn’t a single Odyssey in sight.
[via Kung Fu Grippe]
Update: To be clear, the awesomeness of this review has nothing to do with the awesomeness of Homer. I think the Odyssey and Homer are great. The review is great in and of itself because of how it represents the “glories” of the “community-driven content” Web 2.0 movement.
Star Wars toys that didn’t make the cut
Just in time for Christmas: Star Wars toys and action figures that didn’t make the cut.
Including the Tatooine Smoldering Moisture Farm set (smoldering corpses sold separately). Of course, you can get those separate pieces: Aunt Beru (smoldering corpse) and Uncle Owen (smoldering corpse). There’s also the Dead Ewok (you know, the one from Return of the Jedi), which is just a ball of fur at the bottom of the plastic package.
And, my favorite, the Force.
Get them all before the collectors buy them all up and stash them in their bedrooms in the basement of their parents' house.
